“I don’t believe you. I know autism. I study it, and you’re not autistic.”
“I wonder how much research you have done into Asperger’s.”
These are two actual comments that have been spoken or written to me respectively, the second in regards to the protagonist in a short story I wrote in class. They have stuck with me over the past three years for multiple reasons. One, they indicate two people who at the time were only aware of autism as individuals showing more obvious behavioral symptoms such as low social skills, sticking strictly to routine, and/or having a tendency to be obsessed with one subject or hobby. Two, autistic individuals with higher functioning skills in society didn’t fit their classification of autism. Three, my form of Asperger’s was practically invisible to them.
After mulling over these comments for a good long while, I feel the need to emphasize here that autism is a spectrum in the same way that IQ varies, but not in the linear way you might expect. Rebecca Burgess wonderfully models the spectrum as a gridded circle like a dart board (see full comic here).
The idea is that the spectrum is divided like a pie chart into five sections: language, motor skills, perception, executive function, and sensory filter. These sections represent “traits,” or ways the brain processes information. Now take five darts and throw one into each section. Likely they’ll be a bit scattered. The closer to the center a dart is, the more apparent that trait is because it creates problems in every day life, which makes it diagnostic. The closer the dart is to the ridge, the less problematic the trait. In some cases it’s actually rather helpful in day-to-day activities.
For example, there may be an autistic individual with an apparent trait in motor skills (can’t sit still, always fidgeting or rocking themselves or even hitting themselves), but less apparent in perception, so they fully understand what’s going on around them, they just seem distracted because they can’t sit still. These two traits can be flipped so that motor function isn’t a problem, but understanding a question can be difficult and so they need extra time for their brain to process it. And this isn’t including possible trait combinations from the other three sections (language, executive function, and sensory filter).
For me personally, these five traits were more apparent when I was younger, but years of counseling, social drilling, and struggle had trained my brain to better understand information as well as interact and adapt to society. My darts are now closer to the rim, with minor difficulties in perception and executive function (my brain still gets a slight delay processing questions or instructions at times, which then delays my response in acting on them while I ask repeatedly for clarification). I also still have a habit of preferring certain routines and uniformity.
So, in conclusion, please do not assume someone is lying when they tell you they’re autistic. Less apparent traits don’t disqualify them from the spectrum.
Note: my posts may talk about those “lower” or “higher” on the spectrum, and by this I mean that a person’s collective traits are more apparent (lower/toward the center) or not as much (higher/towards the rim). I know this terminology might be combining the dart board and linear models, but it’s the best wording I know of.
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